The Kelisa Konspiracy

(Originally Posted On September 14th 2003)

This is a true incident which happened to one of my friends. It so happened one of my friends had one of those cute little Kelisas, sunburst yellow in color and had a black rooftop. This Kelisa car belonged to Jocelyn, a cute 20-year old gal with jet black hair. (Okay, let's not get too carried away...) :0)

Anyway, trouble (or rather, slight teasing) began when another of my friends (code-named Tau Foo Fa or Chinese Beancurd since he had such white skin) mistook a yellow Kelisa that passed by our car for Jo's car (She's the only gal in church with the car) but of course, by combining both logic and sense together, one would know obviously that there're a million of those cars on our Malaysian road, and you can't say for each car that looks like her car, you think that it was her car (Confusing statement here).

But matters aside, I began composing a list of the possible scenarios that I might encounter each time a yellow Kelisa zoomed by. Here are the scenarios (along with the level of insanity) :-

CASE 01

We're happily driving along a stretch of road when we see a yellow Kelisa pass by us on the opposite side of the trafic. "Hey, that's Jocelyn!" says my friend, when obviously it was not. Then almost immediately, another yellow Kelisa zooms from behind, overtaking my "Toyota Supra". "Hey, that's Jo again, but how did she manage to get to the other side of road so fast?" exclaims my friend. That second Kelisa wasn't piloted by my friend Jo either for your info.

Insanity Level : 1/5 (1 out of 5)

Final Verdict : Okay, can be forgiven for thinking that the yellow Kelisa was Jo, but the second Kelisa ???

CASE 02

We are happily driving along a stretch of road when a yellow Kelisa zooms past us. "Hey, that's Jo! (1st assumption when a yellow Kelisa is spotted) C'mon, let's speed up a little and catch up with 'her'". So we do, and when we overtake the car, he finds not Jocelyn but a big, hairy man inside the Kelisa (obviously too small for him, as his head is cramped against the roof.) "Omigosh! That's not Jo! That guy must have stolen Jo's car!" My friend panics and suffers from slight migraine.

Insanity Level : 2/5

Final Verdict : Thank God he didn't stop the guy's car & beat him up for "stealing" Jo's car.

CASE 03

This time, when we are "happily" driving along the same old stretch of road again, all Kelisas (regardless of color whether they're yellow or not) are "Jo" and my friend has his day shouting, "Hey, there's Jo, and there she is again, and 3 Jos all in a row behind us! Waaaaagh!" Starts tearing at hair, confused over which "Jo" is the real "Jo".

Insanity Level : 4/5

Final verdict : Starting to get scary, and hey, stop dirtying my Supra with your hair!

CASE 04

Totally freaked out over countless "Jocelyns", now every gal that looks like Jo is regarded as, well, Jo, by my friend. So you can imagine how many times he has to scream, confused over so many "Jos" in so many Kelisas. Strain is too much for him, finally goes kaput.

Insanity Level : 100/5

Final Verdict : I had to scribble in Level 100 since this is really scaring me out...

EPILOGUE

The above story was true to a certain extent, but mostly exaggerated (Like duh). So I would like to thank Jocelyn for letting me use her name as the test subject here (no hard feelings ya) and making a story out of nothing at all. Thanx Jo. :0)