2006: A Boleh-land Odyssey
grav·i·ty [grav-i-tee] - Noun, Plural -
1. the force of attraction by which terrestrial bodies tend to fall toward the center of the earth.
2. heaviness or weight.
3. a required force, which, in the absence of, renders activities such as spinning tops, painting batiks, playing batu seremban and making teh tarik impossible.
My country's done it again! According to one Datuk Rohani Abdul Karim, our country's astronauts will fly up to space to do what no one has done before - play children's games.
Somebody please tell me it isn't true and that she's just been watching too much space opera movies like Star Wars, Star Trek and the likes of it where all the spaceships have built-in gravitational hyperdrives.
I don't know, but the last time I checked, gravity didn't yet make its presence felt in outer space. While you're on the subject, why not ask our two "astronuts" (I intended that) to look for E.T?
Someone with the mental capability of a 3-year old can ACTUALLY get a post in our national space agency department? It's disturbing to know that she might not even have passed her UPSR in the first place. I'm not a rocket scientist (no pun intended) and I know what to anticipate already when the top starts a-spinning in that space station. The Russians must be laughing at us right now. In case you didn't realise it yet, dear Datuk Rohani, should you attempt to play that forementioned batu seremban in a zero-gravity environment, that piece of crappy batu won't come down again once you fling it up. That's because there's NO FRICKING GRAVITY UP THERE!!!
But on a gentler note, I do understand the difficulties of you grasping the theory of zero-gravity, and therefore since Christmas is coming, perhaps I could suggest a few books for you to read while spinning that gasing in space :-
01: How The Apple Discovered Gravity by Sir Isaac Newton
Includes detailed explanation of how gravity was discovered way back during the 17th Century. To capture the reader's attention, lots of colorful illustrations and doodles of Sir Isaac Newton are also to be found within. For ages 10+ and above.
02: Gravity For Idiots
By omitting complicated and hard to understand sentences such as "logically", this book is every gravity learner's beginner dream come true. With over 200 colorful pages printed on glossy paper, it takes the reader back to the time when gravity was not understood. A must for any space agency wannabe. For children aged 5+ and above.
03: Let's Learn About Gravity!
An even more easy-to-understand book stripped down to its bare facts about gravity. Words such as "therefore" and "in conclusion" are taken out, instead focusing solely on the apple and Mr. Newton. As an added plus for slow learners, the reader can also pull a paper lever to activate the mock-up scenario of the apple falling onto the latter's head. Facts and FAQs regarding whether or not teh-tariks can be made while suspending oneself in outer space is also answered. Hint: the answer is no. Sorry to disappoint those who thought the answer was yes. For ages 3+ and up.
04: Alphabet Science Adventures: G Is For Gravity
The simplest book to understand what gravity is so far. There are only ten important recurring words in the fifteen glossy pages - "gravity", "apple", "you", "are", "an", "idiot" being the only main sentences stated more than twice. For toddlers aged 1+ and beyond.
No wonder my country is the butt of jokes all the time. Happy New Year! Thanks for wasting my hard-earned money via taxes.
Trivia:
01: The title is a play on the movie "2001: A Space Odyssey.
02: None of the books listed in above exists... yet.
03: It costs RM95 million per astronaut just to send him to space.
04: The government is already planning for space adventures and a Moon landing by the year 2020 when back on Earth in their own country the roads are still in very bad conditions. Talk about irony.
1. the force of attraction by which terrestrial bodies tend to fall toward the center of the earth.
2. heaviness or weight.
3. a required force, which, in the absence of, renders activities such as spinning tops, painting batiks, playing batu seremban and making teh tarik impossible.
My country's done it again! According to one Datuk Rohani Abdul Karim, our country's astronauts will fly up to space to do what no one has done before - play children's games.
Somebody please tell me it isn't true and that she's just been watching too much space opera movies like Star Wars, Star Trek and the likes of it where all the spaceships have built-in gravitational hyperdrives.
I don't know, but the last time I checked, gravity didn't yet make its presence felt in outer space. While you're on the subject, why not ask our two "astronuts" (I intended that) to look for E.T?
Someone with the mental capability of a 3-year old can ACTUALLY get a post in our national space agency department? It's disturbing to know that she might not even have passed her UPSR in the first place. I'm not a rocket scientist (no pun intended) and I know what to anticipate already when the top starts a-spinning in that space station. The Russians must be laughing at us right now. In case you didn't realise it yet, dear Datuk Rohani, should you attempt to play that forementioned batu seremban in a zero-gravity environment, that piece of crappy batu won't come down again once you fling it up. That's because there's NO FRICKING GRAVITY UP THERE!!!
But on a gentler note, I do understand the difficulties of you grasping the theory of zero-gravity, and therefore since Christmas is coming, perhaps I could suggest a few books for you to read while spinning that gasing in space :-
01: How The Apple Discovered Gravity by Sir Isaac Newton
Includes detailed explanation of how gravity was discovered way back during the 17th Century. To capture the reader's attention, lots of colorful illustrations and doodles of Sir Isaac Newton are also to be found within. For ages 10+ and above.
02: Gravity For Idiots
By omitting complicated and hard to understand sentences such as "logically", this book is every gravity learner's beginner dream come true. With over 200 colorful pages printed on glossy paper, it takes the reader back to the time when gravity was not understood. A must for any space agency wannabe. For children aged 5+ and above.
03: Let's Learn About Gravity!
An even more easy-to-understand book stripped down to its bare facts about gravity. Words such as "therefore" and "in conclusion" are taken out, instead focusing solely on the apple and Mr. Newton. As an added plus for slow learners, the reader can also pull a paper lever to activate the mock-up scenario of the apple falling onto the latter's head. Facts and FAQs regarding whether or not teh-tariks can be made while suspending oneself in outer space is also answered. Hint: the answer is no. Sorry to disappoint those who thought the answer was yes. For ages 3+ and up.
04: Alphabet Science Adventures: G Is For Gravity
The simplest book to understand what gravity is so far. There are only ten important recurring words in the fifteen glossy pages - "gravity", "apple", "you", "are", "an", "idiot" being the only main sentences stated more than twice. For toddlers aged 1+ and beyond.
No wonder my country is the butt of jokes all the time. Happy New Year! Thanks for wasting my hard-earned money via taxes.
Trivia:
01: The title is a play on the movie "2001: A Space Odyssey.
02: None of the books listed in above exists... yet.
03: It costs RM95 million per astronaut just to send him to space.
04: The government is already planning for space adventures and a Moon landing by the year 2020 when back on Earth in their own country the roads are still in very bad conditions. Talk about irony.
Labels: Sarcasm
JDream ranted at
12:30
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